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Review

4.5 “I love you forever” stars

I loved this book. A spin on the fairytale of Hansel and Gretel, this book tells the story of Holden and Griselda. Both children of the foster system, they are abducted at the age of 10 by a crazed man who locks them in a cellar, forcing them to work for him and abusing them terribly. With only each other to cling to, they develop an unshakable bond as they struggle to survive. For three long years they exist in terrifying conditions before they make a run for freedom, and while Griselda is able to escape, Holden is recaptured.

“Don’t look back, no matter what. Stone to Stone. I jump, you jump.”

Ten years later, Griselda and Holden are now 23, and are both essentially dead inside. Living meaningless half-lives, they are both tormented by all that they have been through, but more so by their separation. Holden believes that Griselda was killed in her escape attempt and bounces from nameless woman to nameless woman, trying desperately to forget, and taking his anger out as an underground fighter. The man is utterly broken and exists as if he has nothing to live for.

She’d been the first girl to touch his heart and his body with tenderness. She’d been his family, his best friend, his confidante, and companion. He’d loved her fiercely and unconditionally, and her brutal loss had only served to idealize her in his mind and his heart. She was everything he wanted, everything he’d lost, something he could never have.

Griselda has found some contentment with her work as a nanny for a good family, but she subjects herself to a miserable life, putting up with a violent and abusive boyfriend, feeling that it is all that she deserves after leaving Holden like she did. She doesn’t live, she exists, and she plans for and dreams of nothing but finding him again.

A better life for herself? Theoretically, there were probably many ways her life could be improved, but only three that really mattered: find Holden, help Holden, be with Holden again.

Holden, whom she’d loved so fiercely, lost so brutally, and missed so terribly these long ten years.

Their lives are turned completely upside down when they unexpectedly see each other again. The moment is full of all of the emotion and intensity that you would imagine, and I was glued to my kindle as it all unfolded. But it’s not all rainbows and butterflies – there is uncertainty there, guilt, the pain of their separation and the fact that they knew each other as children, and now they’re adults. It felt really realistic and the mix of the joy, fear, long-standing love and affection and raging attraction is conveyed really well. But the connection that they shared from all of those years ago is still very much there, and once the shock starts to fade, they know that now that they have found each other again, they have no intention of letting go.

“So we’ll try this? … Being together?”
“We’ve always been together … Even when we were apart, we were still together. Even when I thought you were gone, you still lived inside my heart.”

“I’m ruined for anyone but you … I always have been.”

Somewhat surprisingly, it’s Holden that is the one who drives the emotional aspect of their reunion. The story is told in dual POV so we know what they’re both thinking, but more often than not it’s Holden that comes out and says it, and I have to say, pretty much every time he opened his mouth, I was reduced to a swooning puddle of goo on the floor. His openness and honesty is beautifully refreshing, and he has no hesitation in sharing his heart with Griselda.

“I’ve been half dead for ten years, Gris, but then you walked back into my life, and I came alive again. You make me want to live. You make me want to be a better man.
“I love you, and when I said that, I mean that you’re my reason for breathing, for eating, for drinking, for sleeping, for living. I will neverhurt you. I will never leave you. I will always protect you. There is no one more important to me than you, and as long as I live, there never will be.”

Things progress pretty quickly, and their years of longing for each other seamlessly evolve into a deep and all-consuming love that sweeps them both away. It’s sweet and tender, but also incredibly passionate, and it even though it’s fast it seems like such a natural progression for them. Their connection is incredibly special, and I adored their beautiful love story.

“I’m in love with you. With everything I am, I love you.”

But their reconnection is soon complicated by real life. Back in the real world, Griselda has an asshole boyfriend, and Holden has a (sort of) girlfriend/fuck buddy, and life is about to throw them a curveball which neither of them could have ever seen coming. There’s a fair bit of drama, some of which is tragically heartbreaking, but as difficult as their circumstances are, I never doubted them, or their ability to be strong and see it through.

Spoiler

“It’s true that I’ll be leaving you tomorrow morning, angel, but tomorrow isn’t an end. I swear to you with everything I am and everything that I’ll ever be: tomorrow is just the beginning. It’s the first day of a journey that ends with us being together.”

The road to their happy ever after is not an easy one, and Griselda doesn’t help with some moments of stupid, but they are quickly quashed by Holden, who wasn’t about to let her get lost in her head, or put up walls between them. Instead, every hurdle that they have to face just makes them more determined to fight for the future that they both dream of, and had me falling more in more in love with them as a couple.

“Forever, Griselda. Once you’re mine, I’ll never let you go.”
“I already belong to you.”

The story twists and turns, and there are some surprises in there. And although it’s an angsty read at times (with the occasional eye rolling moment), and I did have some moments of dread, I think the way it all played out was really well done. Griselda and Holden are amazing together, but they’re also great individually, and I loved seeing their character development and watching them find strength in each other to stand strong, on their own, as well as together.

“Are you whole or broken?”
“I’m whole … I’m whole because I’m with you.”

This is my first read by Katy Regnery, and I was really impressed. Gris and Holden’s unwavering connection really drives this story and it is powerfully and beautifully told. Tragic and heartbreaking, but beautifully hopeful and wonderfully romantic, the feels are intense from start to finish, and I felt all of it along with the characters. And it’s all worth it for the ending that left me hugging my kindle and sighing happily.

I loved it – 4.5 stars.

An Advanced Reader Copy was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.